Skip to main content

Do Amish and Mennonite girls get to pick their husbands?

 I grew up in a plain hybrid Amish/Mennonite community in Michigan that was part of a larger church in Pennsylvania called Charity Christian Fellowship. People did not date in these plain religious communities. Instead, they did something called courtship or courting.   My first personal interaction with this process was when my favorite big brother decided to marry when I was seven years old. The first thing he did was go to our Father and ask what he thought about the young lady from the church he’d been praying about getting to know better.  Our father gave his blessing and went to go visit the young lady’s father to inquire if he was open to marrying his daughter to my brother. Her father gave his blessing and said he’d ask her if she was open to entering a courtship with my brother with the goal of marriage within 6 months.  She said YES when her father asked and their courtship officially began.  My brother and now dear sister-in-law were made for each other across time and desti
Post a Comment

What kind of games do Amish and Plain children play?

Growing up Amish there are a lot of daily chores to be done. However, there is also a lot of joy when it comes to games. Traditional games for mainstream American children such as baseball or basketball are not generally played. This is interesting considering the wide acceptance of other games that incorporate balls and running in connection to other games. 

A common game my siblings played in the summer months growing up in Michigan was called “kick ball”. This game was similar to baseball except you kicked the ball vs swing at with a bat. Another common game played also by mainstream children, was capture the flag or red rover.  

We also had homemade swing sets, tire swings, and other similar toys in addition to a playhouse where my sisters and I played house with our dolls. In these aspects, our childhood was charmed. In addition to living on an 18-acre farm with gorgeous woods and a pond. Unlike today’s helicopter parents, we were given almost total freedom to explore without caution.

For example, one winter my brothers build an ice slide out of snow and water off of the barn roof. We kids (11) were allowed to climb up to the barn roof and slide down the ice slide to our heart's content. We were also given warm cocoa with milk when we got back indoors by the fire to warm. Some afternoons there would also be fresh warm bread slathered in homemade butter from our cows to go with the hot cocoa. These are the happy moments that stand out to me from my childhood. 

The downside was that girls were not allowed to wear snow pants in the winter. This is because it is forbidden in these religious communities for a woman or girl to wear anything that pertains to a man. So while my brothers got to wear snow pants outside to insulate in the winter, my sisters and I had to just wear dresses with homemade flannel non-waterproof bloomers underneath when we went outdoors. 

What did you enjoy playing growing up? 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

How are Amish and Plain Community Children Disciplined?

Amish children and those raised in Mennonite and plain communities have a lot of rules to follow and high expectations. For example, a 4-year-old is expected to sit quietly through a 2 to 3-hour church service without fussing or entertainment. If the child is wiggling or starts being disruptive one of the parents will take them out for a spanking. This will repeat without deviation until the child stops being a child and sits perfectly still for the duration of the long Sunday services.  These spankings would be with a 2" by 1" wooden 3 foot rod or larger depending on the day. Some days I was struck with thick pointy tree branches, or a toilet-bowl brush, or wire hanger.  Corporal punishment is not only the golden standard for child raising in these communities but is viewed as a command from God. They interpret Proverbs 23: 13 - 14 literally "Do not with- hold discipline from your son; if you beat him with a rod, he will not die".   It was a common experience grow
Post a Comment
Read more

Do Amish women and children have rights?

The term "Amish" is frequently used as a cute branding tool for rural areas and groceries ranging from chicken to baked goods. I grew up in one of these “plain” religious communities. Women and children were treated horrifically. As such, it is hard to see depictions in the media or newspapers that romanticize the “Amish” culture and ways. Below is a letter recently written to the editor of the local paper in response to featuring a section romanticizing the Amish for clickbait.   To Whom It May Concern,  I love reading the news and greatly appreciate the service you provide our local community. I was surprised, however, one day to see a Lifestyle Section titled “Amish Kitchen” as a regularly featured column on your social media pages. I found this greatly troubling. I grew up in a hybrid Amish/Mennonite Community in Copemish called Charity Christian Fellowship and knew many people who I frequently interacted with from Amish, Mennonite, and other communities.  These were not
Post a Comment
Read more

What is it like to grow up Amish?

  I grew up in a religious community similar to the Amish and Mennonite communities called “Charity”. This name came from the main church located in Pennsylvania called Charity Christian Fellowship. Our church was located in Michigan and called Marilla Christian Fellowship.     I'm the one wearing brown in the center Church members had no contact with the outside world and kept members isolated.  Men were the head of the church and the home with women being homemakers and having children. Inside this world, there was no such thing as science or musical instruments. The police were only a vague group described as evil people who served Satan and would hurt us if they came in contact. I first learned that there were people in this world who didn't believe in beating women and children at a doctor's office by chance due to having serious health issues. I used the laddies' room alone and saw a poster depicting domestic violence with big Xs.  I now work in forensic psycholo
Post a Comment
Read more